“Hello. Is this Macy’s?”

The other day at work, I received a voice message.

It was from a dude named Craig, who wanted to make sure I’d received his Macy’s application.

I don’t work at Macy’s, don’t even shop there. Come to think of it, I probably haven’t watched the Thanksgiving parade that bears its name for 20 years.

But practically every day, I get inquiries about the company. “When are you hiring? Does it help that I have 20 years of forklift experience? What’s your insurance plan like? Does it matter that I’ve been convicted of a felony?”

The first 100 times this happened, I played nice.

“Hey, listen. You have the wrong number. I’ve written some stories about this distribution center’s opening but that’s it. Really. I have nothing to do with interviews or recommendations or callbacks. You need to call the company.”

And therein lies the rub.

While my name and phone number is attached to everything I do — it’s called accountability — Macy’s leaves its potential employees flappin’ in the breeze, directing them to some cold, sterile website for information.

And when people get desperate, they put two and two together and come up with five, such as calling a newspaper reporter about an assembling line job at Macy’s.

Everyone reaches a breaking point, and I’m reaching mine.

Macy’s, you’re costing me productivity and sullying your brand.

Suck it up and do your job so I don’t have to.



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